An abbreviated rant concerning SaTC: The Movie

This post was once a seven paragraph long diatribe against the Sex and the City movie, which I saw Friday night. But then I read everything I wrote and it depressed me - if I hated the fucking movie so much, why did I feel compelled to blog about it? Ew and I wasted at least 20 minutes bitching. So Select All, delete, yep that's what I did.

I will sum my experience watching the Sex and the City movie as this: If I were a less respectful movie-goer, I'd have heckled that piece of shit excuse for cinema the entire 14 hours it was on the screen (ooops, I mean 2.5 hours - whatever, that's an easy mistake to make).

At one point, a girl directly behind me was talking on her cell phone (something I always thought was an urban myth - who knew that people could be such raging douchebags!) Just as I was about to turn around and tell her to STFU, I thought, wait a second, I don't even care about this movie, it sucks! I'm gonna listen to this girl's conversation instead...

If you have yet to see the "biggest cinematic event of the year," take my advice and don't bother. Get a bootleg copy and watch it at home - I wouldn't normally advocate watching bootlegs, but that fucking movie had so much explicit product placement, the producers/actors/director/crew/catering people can afford to have you not pay them to see it.

As a sidenote, I want to draw your attention to a movie trailer that I saw during the previews of the SaTC movie. I will not be seeing this movie, because wow, I rolled my eyes so many times as it played, I thought my eyeballs would disconnect from their retinas. I was actually embarrassed for it, like when I went and saw The Matrix:Reloaded with my friends, and that scene where all the Zionists are going crazy, jumping around and dancing, came on the screen. You watch it and can't believe how utterly ridiculous it is, and you go wow, I have no training in film or editing, but this is just egregious...what in the hell were they thinking when they filmed this scene?


So here it is, the trailer for Nights in Rodanthe (omg, the name alone screams "lame"), starring Richard Gere and Diane Lane. Please tell me how many times you wanted to gag while you watched (note: I am not responsible for dry cleaning bills).

Nights in Rodanthe Trailer