As soon as Palin's mug was broadcasted on tv screens across the nation, everyone just couldn't believe the uncanny resemblance Palin bore to Fey (or Fey to Palin? What's the chicken and egg in this instance? Oh god, nevermind, please don't waste brain cells considering that). "What a boon to Fey's SNL career!" everyone proclaimed. In fact, a Mr. Scott Sode of NYC took the time to write into TV Guide about the dopplegangers - he's quoted in the September 15 issue of the magazine, next to side-by-side photographs of the 4-eyed brunettes. "Separated at Birth?" TV Guide inquiries of the the ladies.
But I'm here to state - for the record - that Tina Fey and Sarah Palin look nothing alike! Sure, Fey is the most qualified to play Palin on SNL, but the mild likeness they share is not something people should be in awe over. Observe:
(Ok I know, Fey's is a recent pic while Palin's was taken when she was a baby fetus, but it was the only pic of Palin I could find where she wasn't wearing glasses and that is the crux of my argument)
Their jawlines are different. The shape of their eyes is different. The structure of their faces is really not all that similar, yet because they are attractive brunettes who happen to wear glasses, automatically they are twin sisters that has everyone wondering if they, too, have a mysterious lookalike hiding somewhere on the globe.
Put a pair of glasses of any of these lovely ladies, pile their hair on top of their heads, and bam - you've got Sarah Palin lookalikes.
Now why the reason for this petty bitching, you ask? (You are wondering that, right?) Because I have heard from three different people that, while wearing glasses with my hair pulled into a ratty bun, I look like Sarah Palin. And that's bullshit because I don't look like Sarah Palin, and furthermore, I don't wanna look like Sarah Palin!!!!!!!!!
I'm super self-conscious as of late to pull my hair up - which is my daily hairstyle - while brandishing my spectacles, which is currently a necessity because my contacts have been feeling like the devil's fiery tea saucers when sitting on my eyeballs. Palin is a household name now, so if three people think I resemble Palin, there's a good chance that every person I see, ever, is thinking the same thing. This is a heavy burden to endure, people! I don't want my looks to be synonymous with some babbling moose killer, an idiot who needs no mocking because her ridiculousness is so blatant. This is so goddamned unfair.
I'd love to wrap this post up with a cute little moral or expletive filled rant, but I need to find another day to day look that is nothing like Sarah Palin. What do you guys think - should I aim to look like Paris Hilton or Tila Tequila? I just need to look like less of an idiot than Sarah Palin, so either one of those ladies' styles should work.
UPDATE: An old college pal sent me this link after reading my blog - maybe I'm perceiving this likeness to Palin in the completely wrong way. I should be monopolizing on it, not hating it!
NEED SARAH PALIN LOOKALIKE ASAP (craigslist)
3 comments:
I think you should aim to look like the aftermath of a bukkake shoot.
And no, you don't look anything like Sarah Palin.
Vern - you're right, I don't look like Sarah Palin! But funnily enough, I think I look like her more than Tina Fey does.
I think you are wrong.
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