I am not a doll designer...nor would I want to insult anyone who put their heart and soul into sculpting this little baby's face...but this thing looks like it is in the middle of taking a huge baby dump into it's cloth baby diaper. Cute?
Too bad the scan didn't come out sharper, because it doesn't quite capture the exquisite pain etched into this doll's face. I scanned it from an insert that fell out of my neighbor's Fingerhut catalog. As I was rifling through the mail it dropped onto the floor at my feet. Like any apathetic New Yorker, I was going to leave it there for someone else to clean up (hey! It didn't fall out of my catalog), but something about the baby's face caught my eye...it looked way too much like Damien, in fact that little green cap is probably hiding a 666 emblem. Thus, I had to share it with my readers. Hope you don't get nightmares!
The Heavenly Handfuls web site offers 4 different babies to choose from, and get this - they're only six inches long! That must be good because the web site is so proud to tell us that fact - only six inches long! Only $29.99 for six inches of plastic!!!!! WHEEEEEEEE!
Maybe my sarcastic enthusiasm is a bit overkill, but let us all note what it says on the baby's cap: "I Melt for No One." Well fuck you too, tiny baby dressed in green. Let's both sit on a radiator and see who melts quicker.
1 comment:
you make me laugh
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