Sunday, May 4, 2008

Frig, maybe I should make time to see Apocalypto

Throughout time, earth-dwellers have been convinced that the end of the world is near. I could list some examples of Chicken Littles, but frankly, there are too many. So here's a link - click it and see just how often humans have been convinced that the world's demise was on the horizon.

That mentality kind of makes sense - the thought that the world could all of a sudden blow up, or be hit by a comet, or succumb to plague is freakin' terrifying, therefore gripping. But all this apocalyptic fear is further proof that humans are by nature raging narcissists. Really? You think that your society is so special as to require God's wrath? Your society is that much more perverse, gluttonous and immoral than any other society that ever existed to deserve obliteration? Gah, get over yourselves already!

That said - did you guys know that the world is going to end in 2012? For real this time! The History Channel says so!

The Maya were a nation of people that lived in what is now Mexico, Guatemala and Belize between 300 and 1000 AD. They had very advanced concepts of time and astronomy (far more than the Romans or Egyptians), and had designed their own calendar that not only documented their existence, but extended all the way into the 21st century.

But their calendar curiously ends in the year 2012. This may be because the calendar designer got tired - hey, it happens - but there is an astronomical event taking place in the year 2012 that is backing up the belief that the world will end.

On December 21, 2012, the planets will align, an occurrence that has yet to happen during the time of man.

No one knows what will happen, but even scientists are convinced that something will happen. Perhaps on catastrophic levels, perhaps not.

Many believe that this proven astronomical occurrence compounded with the end date of the Mayan Calendar is evidence that our time on earth is near an end, and how typical - the world is going to end right before Christmas and my birthday. Boo-urns. Yikes, this narcissism is hard to keep in check.

So what shall we do? I'm sure that as 2012 approaches, you all will be hearing more about this "prophecy" as well as this planetary phenomenon, and you will start to get antsy, much like the Y2K scare. Stock up on water and food? Guns? Gold? What WILL be the desired commodity when humankind is uniformly under fire?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that on December 21, 2012, the desired commodity will be the latest Tickle Me Elmo. Or the PS5! I'm standing in line for mine right now. Stupid apocalypse better not ruin my Christmas!

USA Today article, "Does Maya Calendar Predict 2012 Apocalypse?"

History Channel, "Decoding the Past"

5 comments:

Business Horse said...

Dude, can we bang before the end of the world?

AndSheWas said...

Vern - ok, but only if my boyfriend can come. Get it? Come? BWAHAHAH oh I'm such a delight.

Business Horse said...

I mean, that's kind of gay, but since the next day will be the end of the world, I guess I'm down.

You wrote that because he's reading this, didn't you? Yinz know Vern means no harm.

AndSheWas said...

Actually, I beg him to read the stuff I write, and though he does a good job of looking at the computer screen and laughing intermittently, I don't think he actually reading it.

Unknown said...

im happy you decided to post on this, and well put, i must add. i really look forward to reading your new posts, i even have you bookmarked!!